A particularly important woman has pointed out that such language is inappropriate, even if completely needed for emphasis. As such, the written version of bleeps has been used. ** replaces key letters.(Another Classic that was well received by the thick skinned) CAUTION: Strong Language Follows:
Sometimes, ya just gotta tell it like it is. If ya have sensitive eyes, look away.
There are few as proficient at swearing as those in the military. Cuss words emphasize the point being made and all points in the military require emphasizing, usually 3 times. Hence the phrase made known to me by a Master Sergeant when dealing with REMF’s:
“F**k you you f**king f**k!” It not only demonstrates the various ways that this word can be used, but clearly related his feelings to a hapless finance lieutenant telling him that the funds needed for some high risk 16 hour a day, 6 ½ day a week, sweat drenched, gut wrenching training would not be made available.
It is also quite clear that no recruit, being by his very nature, a civilian wannabe Soldier could understand the intricacies of swearing. In order to overcome this, we put these recruits through basic training, where they not only learn which way to point their weapon and how to march but get an immersion course into swearing by some of our most proficient NCO’s who scare the hell out of the few officers they sign for.
At the end of basic and AIT, our young soldiers have been exposed to the full vocabulary and uses of swear words and have begun to attempt to form proper sentences with them. This is initially a bit awkward for them and requires constant practice which invariably results in them asking their pastor father to “pass the f**king potatoes” and the awkward silence that follows as they have forgotten that they are on leave and attending the church pot luck in honor of them having passed the most recent school.
After bringing Mom back from the hospital from a head injury induced by hitting her head on the picnic table as she passed out at the above potluck dinner, they return to their duty station to continue their education in this new language.
They get to their unit and after in processing, searching for their ID 10T form, searching out the f**king contour lines, being f**king sent after a box of flight line, and asking the commo NCO for a f**king PRC-E7, they are well on their way to the proper use of these adjectives.
By the time they make Sergeant, they’ve learned that the direct address form can get them in trouble when dealing with sensitive privates with politically correct ideals. They’ve pretty much learned the methods of military communication and can provide proper emphasis in nearly any given situation such as combat.
Combat I should add is like the hyper immersion course in military emphasis. A few weeks or months will have one cussing like the proverbial sailor. A full tour and you can make a sailor blush.
But then one begins to attend leadership schools or professional development academies and letting out a swear word in one of those classes you give can result in having 3 more classes to give so that you can learn not to cuss when teaching these young privates in your charge, despite the fact that they are still in need of instruction in the art of emphasis.
There’s good reason for this. First of all senior NCO’s need to be able to communicate with civilians who blush much easier than sailors and we only want to make them blush a little bit, which can be done with some by showing up in class A’s. Secondly, emphasis is more profound if only used in particular circumstances. We can now tell the private to go get the box of flight line without emphasis, since it is already represented by the rockers on the uniform. At the first hint of hesitancy, a full barrage of emphasis will send him out the door at triple time. And it will be a long time before he forgets how quickly the emphasis of those rockers can transform into the emphasis of language.
By the time, he gets his second rocker; an NCO is generally forced to sign for a young butterbar. They are very tender things and in need of constant care and attention, much like a new puppy, though puppies learn quicker. Just like a puppy, you can ruin a butterbar pretty quick if you emphasize too much and without clear reasons. They get confused and lost often and it’s your responsibility to turn them into upstanding leaders of men. So it’s real important that you can turn your emphasis on and off at will and for good reason with clear direction.
Later, you get a diamond in the middle and you have to emphasize all those things to your young NCO’s as well as the captain you trained from a puppy. You get to use all those skills you learned but you still have to turn it off when talking to the wives since they expect their husbands boss to be a respectable man teaching him not ask for everything “f**king.”
When you get that star and wreath in the middle, you’ve learned all of the above skills and it’s again time to put great emphasis on things. Nothing you have to say is without emphasis because the troops wouldn’t respect a man in your position who talked about things unimportant and hence not needing emphasis. And again you know to turn it off in front of their wives, because again they need to respect their husband’s boss to be teaching their husbands to stop swearing so much at the dinner table.
But get two combat vets together talking about anything from the decorations of the church to baseball and there will be lots of emphasis made, especially if the women aren’t around, but usually their presence is a moot point and a Sergeant Major’s wife has long since realized that emphasis is needed when talking to other soldiers.
And that my friend is how one graduates from the College of Cussing (E6) and becomes a professor at it (E9).
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War On Terror News©2007-2009, ARM, All Rights Reserved
Originally posted at: http://waronterrornews.multiply.com/
I do hope y'all enjoyed this less serious but entirely true account of military training.
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